Breakdancing- Kim Jong Ill Style

South Korea Embraces the Breakdancing Craze

South Korean kids are going nuts over it. Breakdancing is being featured in TV commercials. It is all over the place.

I'm pretty sure it was twenty years ago. Yea, I remember the first "rap" record ever recorded was "The Sugarhill Gang" with Rappers Delight. I think that was 1976. In 1979, disco died a quick death. It was tough for any "R & B" artist to get a hit on the charts. Music moved into a New Wave or Punk sound.

It was 1982 (or 83) that I saw the first breakdancers in big cities. You had to be a circus performer or a gymnast to do the freaking moves these guys were doing. Later they developed a "popping and locking" move, which allowed average people to get involved in breakdancing without breaking their necks.

Actually, as I write this- I'm "popping." But I'm too old to "lock." I might "lock-up" in that position and have to see a doctor. (Dr. Backencracker)

So, probably 1985-6 is when breakdancing hit its peak in America. There were movies about breakdancing- "Breakin'.." You know the story line- Two breakdancers are in LOVE. But there is a rival breakdance team. The hero MUST win the breakdance contest. There might be a couple of breakdance fights. Blah, blah, blah.. (But the music was usually good..)

So now, out of the blue, breakdancing becomes popular in South Korea. They call themselves "B-boys." Remember the "one letter name" craze? There was Sheila E and Bobby B. I called myself- Angry C.

Not to be outdone, North Korea has also entered this "Breakdancing Craze."

In North Korea, Lit' Kim Jong has helped the breakdance craze enter his country. In North Korea, it is a kind of a- "Forced Breakdancing.."

For example, this poor fellow- Sum Wang, he forgot to smile and bow his head when he said the name "Lit' Kim Jong."

He was forced to breakdance his head into this car windshield.

And this other fellow- Yung Wang, he forgot to clap his hands after a Lit' Kim Jong speech.

He was forced to breakdance his head into the pavement. (As you can see, Wang is clapping now.)

Also, there is this poor girl, Dancer- Noa Wang. She was caught fornicating. OK.. She fornicated a lot. (As you can see by this photo)-

So as the Breakdancing craze sweeps all of Korea, we Americans should feel proud. We still influence the cultures of the rest of the world with our freedom of expression. When these Korean kids grow up with neck injuries and back problems, they will remember America.

Gangsta' Rap- "Gots to keep my bitches in line.."

Cowboy hats- hey, this one didn't hurt anybody.

American blue jeans- (that are now made in China) with red, white and blue labels. They have been smuggled into communistic countries for years.

David Hasselhoff- World Famous actor and singer. Nobody can eat a "carpet burger" the way he can.

The musical group- "Abba".. (No wait.. We didn't create Abba. Thank God.)

But we did create "The Pussycat Dolls." A musical act that gyrates around the stage in women's underwear. How can that hurt anybody..?? The words to their songs are so prolific- "Loosen up my buttons baby" "Don't cha wish your girlfriend was a freak.."

Brokeback Mountain- Because what the world needed right then.. Was a couple of gay cowboys.

So on this day, we Americans can feel proud. Another expression of American freedom has taken flight. It has landed in South Korea.

Written by Babonie for The Angry Republic